Sunday, September 09, 2012

Motherlaterhood part I

About two years ago today, I journalled this entry:

Today, Baby Kim from Kansas, you are 9 weeks along according to sonogram.  I found out you existed on 08/10/2010.  I had to wait about 20 hours to tell your daddy about this face-to-face since I was in Kansas City at the time.  Your daddy is excited.  Even though I am sometimes a little irritable (ask Daddy), knowing you are here has lifted my mood immensely.  I love you so much already!  Yes, you will change our lives!  You will change our priorities.  You will make us grow and experience uncomfortable situations.  You will bring love in our lives that we have never known before.  I am happy to be experiencing this with you and Daddy.  Because of you, my life is better already.  I am dreaming of the day when you come out and Daddy and I teach you "the happy dance".  I do want time to take its course and have you come out healthy while we will be preparing for your arrival.  

I know that you will have "older parents" than some of your friends.  I do feel that your daddy and I are...

And then I got interrupted.  I'm not sure what I was going to write next.  I was 40 years old.  Yes, I had my first child one week after turning age 41.  In medical terms it's called advanced maternal age.

My mom would be thrilled we finally had a child if she were on earth!  She would think it was so funny that we waited so long since I used to complain that I had the oldest parents in my class at school.  She was 36 when she had me.  For being the unplanned child, I'm amazed that my family always made me feel like I was a blessing.

I hope my son feels that way, too!  He wasn't unplanned, just late.  I will tell him about his grandparents.  I will tell him how much their absence has impacted my life.  I will tell him how he helped fill some of the absence, but that's not the reason he is here on earth.  He is here to make the world a better place.  He has made my world a better place!